I certainly know lots more at first hand (rather than from the pages of my Guardian) about the challenges women from East Africa face - poverty for most, with running the house and feeding the family very much still seen as women's work - the guys at our local fruit and veg stall were amused and a bit perplexed when Jamie biked up there yesterday to get the ingredients he needed to cook family supper. Wasn't that my job? High birth rates are the norm, leaving lots of women bringing up at least 4 kids, stretching already low incomes with older children living "up country" with relatives so they can go to school whilst their parents try and earn more money in the city. It's a tough life and I'm so impressed by the women I know who keep smiling and just get on with it.
Then there are the very high levels of gender based violence, a tradition of female circumcision and an apparent acceptance that men will be unfaithful in relationships (if the daily slot on prime time radio designed to expose and laugh at male infidelity is any indicator). When I was election observing a woman asked if she could take a photo of her filled in ballot paper before casting her vote. This of course isn't allowed as its one way of cashing in on bribes offered if you vote a certain way. But my Kenyan colleague instantly assumed she wanted it to avoid being beaten up by her husband when she got home. And when I was interviewing for a nanny a Kenyan friend advised against employing a married woman on the grounds her husband would not be happy if she stayed over to babysit and in many households would use the threat of violence to get his way. I chose not to take her advice on who I employed but the description of domestic life for many has stayed with me.
A year ago I had high hopes of doing something during our time here to make life better for women like this. But I haven't really delivered on that and have already filled my life to the point that I'm pretty sure I wont now do so. I make myself feel better by thinking that we provide a livelihood for a couple of women in our home (and support more families) and that we are doing our best to make sure they are better able to get and keep good jobs when they leave us than when they started. And I baked (and ate my share of) cakes for our IWD cake sale at work yesterday helping to raise nearly £2k for a rape centre here in Nairobi. But I know I'm just kidding myself and this isn't helping sustainable change for women here.
The new Kenyan constitution recognises the need for more female voices in high places. And Monday's election included a vote for women's rep in each constituency (on a pink ballot paper of course!). The choice was generally more limited than in other categories but its a move in the right direction. And 2 of Somalia's relatively new Government are women, including the Foreign secretary. So there are some very prominent role models. And I've met impressive local business women, civil society activists and government employees here, for example a woman who I met in November when she was in the midst of running training for electronic voter registration. She was juggling being a mum of four with her high pressured high profile role trying to make these elections fairer and more transparent than any before them. And she was doing so with heaps of humanity, energy and humour.
And as well as the East African women whose stories I now know more about, I have got to know lots of other inspiring International women at work, in the school playground and through friends of friends. Their individual experiences and stories are all of course different, but much is universal - relationships, parenting, managing expectations (yours and others), building happy homes, the domestics of life......and whilst of course I miss my friends from London and further afield, I have found some great new friends in the last year who help me enjoy the highs and get through the lows of life.
I'm still not sure if the year has made me more of an International woman but looking at Katie enjoying her half term roller blading I get the sense that its helping to shape the girl power of the future
Anne
Lovely blog Anne, thanks, Catrin
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